Hello, everyone!

First topic message reminder :

I'm so glad to be here, and I'm so glad that I've found a forum like this! It will really mean a lot to me to learn from all of you and to talk about all things that interest me in Judaism.

First of all, I will have to ask you to excuse my English if it gets weak at some points, because English is not my first language. Thanks in advance - I'll do my best to write and express myself, and all of you be free to correct me, please.

Basically, this is my story until now: I came into closer contact with Judaism about two years ago due to some private and professional circumstances, but it felt so right to me almost immediately, if I can put it like that. I mean, it felt so easy (complexed as it is, which is one of the most inspiring things about Judaism for me!), it somehow felt so logical to me - everything suddenly made sense! Every effort that I put in every day, my every action, all the responsibilities I had, did and felt even before I delved deeper into Judaism - everything was already there. Sometimes it is kind of difficult or odd to explain, but it felt like Judaism was inside me all my way through. I must admit that when I was younger, it always somehow attracted me, intrigued me, and when the time came that I eventually got in greater touch with it, I started to read, read, learn, learn, think about Judaism, feel it more every day, so - here I am.

What I like most about Judaism until now is its complexity, the great body and layers of knowledge, of history, the perplexity of feeling connected to G-d and to the community in the same time and moment through histories and geographies (although, of course, I know that the Jewish community and culture is very, very complex and includes many different traditions, denominations and variations in it), then I like the way Judaism inspire me to learn, to improve myself every single day, every single moment, to grow on with and within Judaism. It brings me so much joy and comfort.

I'm in the process of learning, so.

I cannot hide that I want the conversion really, really much (I'm thinking of it constantly, to be honest!! ), but I will not rush in. I would like to learn as much as I can and to do my best before I contact a rabbi. I mean, I would be embarrassed if I came to a rabbi knowing that I didn't work my best on my knowledge in Judaism (as much as I can, of course). I live in a country where Jewish community is really small, but I have the luck to live in the Capital city, so that is a great advantage, for sure. I grown up in a pretty liberal family from the point of religion, so I have always been given a space to explore my own path. I thank my parents for that, although I sometimes mourn and complain about my position which was practically outside any religious system or community while I was growing up - I mean, I worry that I'm always going to be "an outsider", "a convert", but I hope that it is quite usual fear or worry at some stage, and that it is here to remind me how strong is, on the other side, my wish to go further on my way to Judaism.

I'm sorry if I were too long in this introduction post. What can I say more of myself? I'm 29, I'm currently on my final year of PhD studies (theory of art&media and gender studies department), I like to listen and learn, and I'm sure I will learn a lot from all of you!

Thanks for reading. I'm so excited to be here!

Thank you, searchinmyroots!

Thank you both!  

I am so, so happy (but I've already said it a million times, haven't I?   )!

Thank you so much. I will give my best, as I always did and always will, because that precious ride actually never stops, which is one of the most beautiful things in Judaism. (I'd like us to have a "heart/(in) love" smiley on the forum also; I would put it right here now! )

What wonderful news, Sarit!

I think a lot of rabbis, especially the more traditional ones, are not immediately very encouraging because they want to get a feel for the prospective convert's level of interest and commitment. Living an observant Jewish life is not so simple and learning enough to be considered a valid candidate for a traditional conversion is also a fairly difficult endeavor. Note also that for serious study leading to conversion, especially in a situation where the rabbi can't send people to some kind of "conversion school" for much of the learning, the sponsoring rabbi will be committing serious time and effort into the process. And he (or she) has to find that time in what is typically already a very busy schedule. All the congregational rabbis I know work very long hours---one of the reasons that my friends who are former congregational rabbis left those positions. So I think it is fair that a rabbi should evaluate the situation carefully before making that commitment.

I think you'll be able to look back at this past year and realize that it was actually a valuable period to ease into Jewish life and get you to the point that you were truly ready to formally begin to study for conversion with a rabbi. I still feel that the over 20 years I spent being very involved in Jewish life before I formally converted were still an important part of the conversion process.

I'm looking forward to hearing more about how things are going as you delve more deeply into the process.

Thank you, Debbie!

You are absolutely right. It is not only the time we put in our conversion path (for studying, increasing observance level, experiencing Jewish life etc), it is also a rabbi's time involved. And yes - we don't have a particular "conversion school" or similar course here - the rabbi will be working with us individually as well as in a group (because there are four of us), approaching everyone of us with full respect of our individuality, also requiring from us a solid level of individual articulation of our understanding and knowledge, and also requiring a knowledge level for studying in pairs creating the dialogue-type of mastering particular subject. I'm very, very excited and can't wait us to begin, and in the same time I'm patient - everything in its time, accompanied with a lot of work and commitment.

Yes - this was/is a wonderful year! I wrote on the same topic purposely, so I could look at my story from time to time (both when I'm up or down) and remember how the things are just growing.